https://open.spotify.com/show/5jexRQbUYQUgqvSByQUGzu?si=770234ffa9af400b
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Writer's pictureLeah Welborn

Where is that Confounded Key? Searching for Joy in all the MOST wrong of places

Part 1 of my Keynote Speech

It’s a dream of mine to be a public speaker. Because I have an awful lot to say, I’m writing a keynote speech in anticipation of being asked to deliver one. I have the gall to believe that people will pay to hear it someday soon. Unbelievable, right? It’s very much a work in progress, but here’s the opening.

Once upon a time, there lived a dear old man who was much beloved by his village.

He had no children of his own, but everyone called him Uncle as they’d known him since their birth. No one, not even the oldest among them, could remember a time when Uncle wasn’t an old man.

One evening, just as the sun was going down, Uncle could be seen outside, under the street lamp, searching for something. Uncle was notorious for getting into harmless mischief, so the villagers kept an eye on him as they finished their tasks. Soon it was dark, and still Uncle searched the ground, stooped over and focused on the ground. People began to come out of their houses to help.

Someone said, “Uncle, we’ll help you. What is it you’re looking for?”

Uncle answered in frustration, “my house key! I’m always losing it!”

It was true, most every one of them had helped Uncle search for his house key at some point in their lives.

Before long, the entire village was out, and it became a festive affair, searching for Uncle’s key all over the village.

A thought occurred to one of the women — she went to Uncle’s door and turned the handle. It opened right in!

“Uncle,” she called out, “your door isn’t even locked!”

“Thank you, Child, but, I know that!” he called back, and continued searching the ground.

A young man asked him, shaking his head and laughing, “Well, Uncle, why are you looking for your key if you knew your house isn’t even locked?”

“Nephew,” Uncle began patiently. “I never said I was locked out, I simply said I can’t find the key.” Some of the villagers threw their hands up in the air and returned to their houses, laughing at Uncle’s antics.

Others promised to come back out tomorrow, to help him search for his key.

“Oh, that’s very kind of you, Children!” Uncle replied. “But there’s really no use in that. You see, I’m quite certain my key is lost inside my house. I was simply searching out here because there’s more light. It’s dark in my house, and I couldn’t possibly find the key in there at night…use your minds, Children!”


It’s a funny little parable, and it illustrates something we’ve probably all been guilty of at some point — looking for something in the entirely wrong place. I know I have.

Among the many important things I’ve searched for in many very wrong places? Happiness.


And like Dear Old Uncle in the parable, I think I knew I was never going to find true, deep happiness in the places I was looking. At best, I might find distraction from my sadness, but that’s almost the opposite of happiness.


Like Uncle, I knew that I was going to eventually have to look inside for the key. But it was dark inside! Quite frankly, I was terrified to explore the dark world inside me…who knew what I might find?


To continue the home metaphor…was the wiring faulty? Did the plumbing work? Was the foundation stable? Oh, dear goddess, could there even be squatters in there?

It took all the strength I could muster, but I found the courage to go into the terrifying, virtually abandoned, brokedown palace that was my life and renovate it. With time and a lot of intentional effort, it’s become the home of my dreams.


In a way, Uncle and I were procrastinating the same inevitable thing — looking within a dark, scary place for the key we each needed.


It’s an intimidating task. So we opted to put it off. And that’s certainly a choice you can make! Actually, it’s the choice most people make.


Ultimately though, and it may take several lifetimes, all that pretending gets exhausting. All that searching for the key in the form of “Oh, maybe I’ll try travel and fine wine! Maybe that will make me happy” gets old (not picking on travel and fine wine…simply saying it’s easy to outsource happiness, whether you do it with a yacht or a cheeseburger).


But when the absurdity of the charade outweighs the benefits of playing along…that’s when life gets interesting.


More to come! Please subscribe to read more of my keynote speech (about keys!).

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